I never felt so knowledgeable in my time as an English teacher as when the topic of Modal Verbs came up, and come up it did, again, and again and again.
Should, would, could, ought to...Explaining the subtle differences took time, talking time, and contrary to the bedstead of TEFL theory, namely 'minimizing teacher talking time', talk I did.
Whenever I sit down to write something, I find my fingers drawn to these omnipresent words...
Why? We love to preach...you should,we could, they ought to
But more than that we love to berate ourselves...mmm, i should...I could, i shouldn't
Our words create our reality, ridiculous as that may seem, and these words delude us into thinking there is some prescribed form of 'right' behaviour. Moreover they disconnect us from a more actionable accessible reality.
Im endeavoring to strike these words my daily usage.....i will do, I am...small words, but words that empower...we have enough reasons to feel guilty (I am Irish, if we didn't invent guilt, we certainly perfected it) lets not add to our burden with with these deviously subtle nuisances
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Saying Goodbye
Today I say goodbye to Mexico.
It strikes me that we know all to well how to say hello, how to welcome somebody or something into our lives, and yet how many of really knows how to say goodbye?
In every moment of our lives, we are bidding farewell. Farewell to people, places, moments, thoughts, feelings, pieces of ourselves. We just fail to acknowledge these moments, busy, as we are with the new and the novel.
A good welcome is one that is met with trust, optimism and appreciation.
I hope to learn how to treat goodbyes in the same manner.
It strikes me that we know all to well how to say hello, how to welcome somebody or something into our lives, and yet how many of really knows how to say goodbye?
In every moment of our lives, we are bidding farewell. Farewell to people, places, moments, thoughts, feelings, pieces of ourselves. We just fail to acknowledge these moments, busy, as we are with the new and the novel.
A good welcome is one that is met with trust, optimism and appreciation.
I hope to learn how to treat goodbyes in the same manner.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Alegria Alegria, Buen Dia Buen Dia
First of all....
No I haven´t kept up the meditation,who woulda thunk it
On a plus note I have a ´follower´, well on my way to Guruhood, thanks Sean.
These things balance themselves out, like a monkey in a tree, and the tree´s growing but,the monkey,the monkey, he´s dyin,of arthritis......
Onwards...
Details. I dislike them. They have an annoying habit of interfering with the more frivolous side of a story,and of life in general for that matter. Best establish them early and work around them.....
SO....
I left Taiwan for a holiday in philipinnes, got refused my visa to china, bought a ticket to colombia and have spent the last few months makin my way down to Bolovia,via ecuador and peru.Im in Sucre,with my brother for the last 3 weeks or so.....
Next.....
Tone
Need a little context,a window into my mindset.So..... I´ve spent the last week tryin to improve my Spanish with an Italian version of ¨The sun also rises¨¨,so turns out my Italian is shit but my Spanish may be better than I thought
Of note;
Ive been robbed twice,Taiwan left me ill prepared for the real world
Westerner feet arent designed for the intricacies of South American Dancing,I call them stupid feet, Bolivians nod condoloncencingly, I still love dancing.......
Warm cola reminds me of childhood Birthday parties in the sun
I read a little bit of The Da Vinci Code,so i could stock up on ´´sentences i will never write´´
All my favourite conversations have invoked the word reality at least dozens of times, Ive had loads of these, BE WARNED
Nobody can spell COLOMBIA correctly and very few ECUADOR, oh sure now you you knew,but did you really? My guess is no.......
Overall: Finally got my rythm in south america, I consider the whole journey a resounding success. I know, be careful, success breeds arrogance, Thankfully I´ve been breeding prize winning arrogance for years, I´m an expert, and a devilishy good looking one at that.......
Gotta go, literally, I´m on a fruit juice diet that makes life.....more unpredictable
Suerte
James
P.s If you want to know what South America is actually like, go buy a book, or read one o those couply blogs which will undoubtedly lay it out in excruciating detail.
E.g Bought a coke today. Tim doesnt drink coke right now. He has diarrhea. His poo is yellow and green. Took a blue bus at 5.54 pm, it was 14 minutes late,but we didnt REALLY mind.....etc etc etc
No I haven´t kept up the meditation,who woulda thunk it
On a plus note I have a ´follower´, well on my way to Guruhood, thanks Sean.
These things balance themselves out, like a monkey in a tree, and the tree´s growing but,the monkey,the monkey, he´s dyin,of arthritis......
Onwards...
Details. I dislike them. They have an annoying habit of interfering with the more frivolous side of a story,and of life in general for that matter. Best establish them early and work around them.....
SO....
I left Taiwan for a holiday in philipinnes, got refused my visa to china, bought a ticket to colombia and have spent the last few months makin my way down to Bolovia,via ecuador and peru.Im in Sucre,with my brother for the last 3 weeks or so.....
Next.....
Tone
Need a little context,a window into my mindset.So..... I´ve spent the last week tryin to improve my Spanish with an Italian version of ¨The sun also rises¨¨,so turns out my Italian is shit but my Spanish may be better than I thought
Of note;
Ive been robbed twice,Taiwan left me ill prepared for the real world
Westerner feet arent designed for the intricacies of South American Dancing,I call them stupid feet, Bolivians nod condoloncencingly, I still love dancing.......
Warm cola reminds me of childhood Birthday parties in the sun
I read a little bit of The Da Vinci Code,so i could stock up on ´´sentences i will never write´´
All my favourite conversations have invoked the word reality at least dozens of times, Ive had loads of these, BE WARNED
Nobody can spell COLOMBIA correctly and very few ECUADOR, oh sure now you you knew,but did you really? My guess is no.......
Overall: Finally got my rythm in south america, I consider the whole journey a resounding success. I know, be careful, success breeds arrogance, Thankfully I´ve been breeding prize winning arrogance for years, I´m an expert, and a devilishy good looking one at that.......
Gotta go, literally, I´m on a fruit juice diet that makes life.....more unpredictable
Suerte
James
P.s If you want to know what South America is actually like, go buy a book, or read one o those couply blogs which will undoubtedly lay it out in excruciating detail.
E.g Bought a coke today. Tim doesnt drink coke right now. He has diarrhea. His poo is yellow and green. Took a blue bus at 5.54 pm, it was 14 minutes late,but we didnt REALLY mind.....etc etc etc
Saturday, June 21, 2008
oh so quiet
In search of enlightenment, or at least an altered state of awareness (the long way round), before I leave this little island, I signed up for a 10 day Vipassana meditation retreat in Taichung county, Taiwan.
The rules: no speaking, sex, meat, drugs, drinking;exercise restricted to walking around the garden
Location: Taichung county,some sort of converted farmhouse. segregated dorms, gardens teaming with life, peaceful.
The timetable: 4AM Gong 4.30-6.30AM meditate 8-11AM meditate, 1-5 meditate, 6-7 meditate, 7-8.15 discourse 8.15-9PM meditate
In other words the timetable looks like this:
mmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeddddddddiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttaaaaaaaaaaaatttttttttttteeeeeeeeeee
Day 1: Sitting in a hall with about 100 other people. Long periods of silence, broken by even longer farts....triumphant farts. Ah Asia.
I am "seated" (crosslegged on a cushion) beside two old Taiwanese men herein referred to lovingly as Gummy and Boo.
Gummy is a wise old man. He teaches me. He teaches me that the most annoying sound in the universe is the incessant gumming of old men. Boo is like an Asian version of the peanut headed old guy from “The Simpsons’’. He randomly exclaims 'booooooooooo'. This seems to upset Gummy’s rhythm. I come to love Boo. When it rains gummy gums blend into the pitter patter. I come to love rain. I am full of love already.
Day 2: My nose clears and I begin to focus as instructed on my breathing. I learn something I have long suspected. I am insane, we are all insane. Time passes....
Day 3: Focus has noticeably improved.
I sit in the garden watching the 10's of swallows swooping and gobbling up insects. Some sort of gnat is eaten by a dragonfly which is almost immediately eaten by a swallow. In my meditation induced Zen like state I nod sagely to myself. Ah, the circle of life, it is all becoming so clear. I resolve name any future daughter ‘Swallow’. 3 hours of deep contemplation later I realize why this might not be such a good idea.....
Day 4: We are instructed in the Vipassana technique; as an added bonus "determination sittings" are announced. 1 hour a session, 3 times a day, absolutely no movement. Like an extended game of statues, a very painful one. I half anticipate the announcement of low energy gruel.
Day 5: starting to get to grips with the technique and am really sensitive to my body. I can also create a really cool body buzz at will, mixed with some funky visuals; this is a thoroughly enjoyable experience,mushroomesque....the good kind. I relate this to my teacher, apparently this is not the way to go...bummer
Day 6: Feeling lethargic from all the sitting I do some sneaky push ups in my bedroom. The Catholic in me feels guilty and wants to confess. What, no speaking...oh joy
Day 7: I break my vow of silence. Walking in the garden I almost step on two snakes, the first noise I make in 7 days is a pathetic girly "eughoooow!" The man who constantly stares wondrously at his hands as if he's just grown them also breaks his silence as he laughs at the girly Irishman "没有毒'' "no poison''. I decide now is no neither the time nor the place to get into St. Patrick and his heroics.
Day 8: The meditation is actually getting really intense at this stage and I’m really making some 'progress'. I have also written 5 new songs and half a science fiction novel...in my head of course, writing is forbidden
Day 9: Last day of no speaking. the long and short of it is I realize I have to get access to a computer and access to the outside world isn’t allowed, so, at 5pm I find myself, despite warnings of 'storms' from the management, hitching a lift with a pastor to the nearest net cafe in Taichung. If there is a word that describes vivid to the point of painful I would use it right about now.
Conclusion: I'm intending on keeping up the meditation,the technique itself is highly logical, practical and beneficial and if you're so inclined(which i most definitely am), trippy. The food was great too ;-)
I’d recommend anybody who is even vaguely interested in this sort of thing to give,or failing that, anybody who finds they're spending too much on psychedelics Certainly one of the more intense experiences of my life.
Like a really, really, really quiet roller coaster.
For more details on the course and organization
http://www.dhamma.org
The rules: no speaking, sex, meat, drugs, drinking;exercise restricted to walking around the garden
Location: Taichung county,some sort of converted farmhouse. segregated dorms, gardens teaming with life, peaceful.
The timetable: 4AM Gong 4.30-6.30AM meditate 8-11AM meditate, 1-5 meditate, 6-7 meditate, 7-8.15 discourse 8.15-9PM meditate
In other words the timetable looks like this:
mmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeddddddddiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttaaaaaaaaaaaatttttttttttteeeeeeeeeee
Day 1: Sitting in a hall with about 100 other people. Long periods of silence, broken by even longer farts....triumphant farts. Ah Asia.
I am "seated" (crosslegged on a cushion) beside two old Taiwanese men herein referred to lovingly as Gummy and Boo.
Gummy is a wise old man. He teaches me. He teaches me that the most annoying sound in the universe is the incessant gumming of old men. Boo is like an Asian version of the peanut headed old guy from “The Simpsons’’. He randomly exclaims 'booooooooooo'. This seems to upset Gummy’s rhythm. I come to love Boo. When it rains gummy gums blend into the pitter patter. I come to love rain. I am full of love already.
Day 2: My nose clears and I begin to focus as instructed on my breathing. I learn something I have long suspected. I am insane, we are all insane. Time passes....
Day 3: Focus has noticeably improved.
I sit in the garden watching the 10's of swallows swooping and gobbling up insects. Some sort of gnat is eaten by a dragonfly which is almost immediately eaten by a swallow. In my meditation induced Zen like state I nod sagely to myself. Ah, the circle of life, it is all becoming so clear. I resolve name any future daughter ‘Swallow’. 3 hours of deep contemplation later I realize why this might not be such a good idea.....
Day 4: We are instructed in the Vipassana technique; as an added bonus "determination sittings" are announced. 1 hour a session, 3 times a day, absolutely no movement. Like an extended game of statues, a very painful one. I half anticipate the announcement of low energy gruel.
Day 5: starting to get to grips with the technique and am really sensitive to my body. I can also create a really cool body buzz at will, mixed with some funky visuals; this is a thoroughly enjoyable experience,mushroomesque....the good kind. I relate this to my teacher, apparently this is not the way to go...bummer
Day 6: Feeling lethargic from all the sitting I do some sneaky push ups in my bedroom. The Catholic in me feels guilty and wants to confess. What, no speaking...oh joy
Day 7: I break my vow of silence. Walking in the garden I almost step on two snakes, the first noise I make in 7 days is a pathetic girly "eughoooow!" The man who constantly stares wondrously at his hands as if he's just grown them also breaks his silence as he laughs at the girly Irishman "没有毒'' "no poison''. I decide now is no neither the time nor the place to get into St. Patrick and his heroics.
Day 8: The meditation is actually getting really intense at this stage and I’m really making some 'progress'. I have also written 5 new songs and half a science fiction novel...in my head of course, writing is forbidden
Day 9: Last day of no speaking. the long and short of it is I realize I have to get access to a computer and access to the outside world isn’t allowed, so, at 5pm I find myself, despite warnings of 'storms' from the management, hitching a lift with a pastor to the nearest net cafe in Taichung. If there is a word that describes vivid to the point of painful I would use it right about now.
Conclusion: I'm intending on keeping up the meditation,the technique itself is highly logical, practical and beneficial and if you're so inclined(which i most definitely am), trippy. The food was great too ;-)
I’d recommend anybody who is even vaguely interested in this sort of thing to give,or failing that, anybody who finds they're spending too much on psychedelics Certainly one of the more intense experiences of my life.
Like a really, really, really quiet roller coaster.
For more details on the course and organization
http://www.dhamma.org
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